out of hiding: a request for out west

hi friends! these last few weeks (um...months...) of the year have been quite the doozy, but with graduation just around the corner, i can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel! i've come out from blogging hibernation to request a slight favor. remember last year, when we headed up the new england coast? remember how you gave me awesome tips and ideas? if it weren't for lovely readers, we wouldn't have known about the rutger's university grease trucks, or cook's lobster house, or a myriad of other little adventures we found ourselves enjoying.

in a little bit, we're headed out west. for a little end-of-the-year-let's-celebrate-no-more-school-EVER-or-at-least-for-now-and-hey!-it's-almost-christmas road trip.

we'll be in phoenix, scottsdale, sedona, the grand canyon, monument valley, zion national park, and las vegas. any tips, ideas or fun little side stops, please comment below! of course, i've made a travel  binder complete with sheet protectors for each activity i've planned so far, but there's always room for a little more fun:)

thank you! and see you in 2013. i promise to be more consistent...i hope.

in the meantime, we are slowly settling into our new digs. pablo has quickly found his resting spot:)

on blogging/ the things they don't show you.

some days, most days, i see the beauty in this pretty little world. i get home at just the right time to see the sun cut across the old oaks and the walk to the mailbox is my favorite two seconds of the day. there are times when my little town, the hay fields, and robert in his old blue collar are truly as magnificant and pastoral as i can write them out to  be.

but then there are days like sunday. when i set forth to make an apple cake in the cast iron skillet, recipe courtesy of the pioneer woman.

because i had a hankering for it. and we just got a skillet a while ago and it needs to be seasoned. and ok, because it would make for a pretty fun blog post the next day. watch me in my apron stir these apples with the sugar! see how pretty the crust rose! you can do this too, here's the steps!

but then i opened the oven door to check on the little pie's progress.

and i saw the flames.

you know what? you find out things about yourself during times of emergency. fight or flight?

i flighted. i grabbed the pie and placed it safely on the counter (priorities, people). then i ran.

right into the living room. frantically. calling robert. fanning my arms. feeling my chest grow tight and my face flushed. THE OVEN IS ON FIRE! i shouted. THE OVEN IS ON FIRE.

and robert, being the deep well of calm that he is, went to the laundry room, grabbed the fire extinguisher, opened the oven door and shot a blast of white powder directly on the flame.

and just like that, it was over. crisis averted.

later that night, robert saved my life again when we went walking and a fercoious dog started approaching us. he stomped his feet and clapped his hands and the dog ran away with his tail between his legs.

so yes, we all have those moments. when the stars align and the world tilts just right on its axis and blogging moments abound. but sometimes they don't. and that's OK too.

because maybe those moments aren't meant to be captured. maybe they're meant to be savored, wholly and personally, between you and the person you love. the person you can sit with, at the end of the day, and savor a slice of apple pie on the front porch swing. the secret trial just between you.

a call for submissions: the blogger mixed tape project

i realized something driving home last night.

every moment that really means something in my life, those big guttural turning points, has a song attached to it. there's the first time i realized i could really love music (iron and wine, passing afternoon). my first kiss (the kings of swing, somewhere over the rainbow). the first time i saw the mountains jut up against the ocean (joni mitchell, california). the moment i stepped down from the alter and walked out the doors of my church a married woman (jackie deshannon, what the world needs now is love). that time in college i walked slowly away from robert on the brickyard, certain i'd lost the love of my life to jealousy and insecurity (daryl worley, i miss my friend).

but i didn't have a song for blogging, something that, in the past year and a half, has brought me so much unbridled, unapologetic joy. a turning point if there ever was such a thing.

i don't have a song yet, because it's not just me blogging.

it's me and you. you fellow bloggers. you readers. you (mom) who read my blog because you are sweet and love me. a community. a band of sisters and brothers and elders and youth.

so i had a grand idea last night, while folding laundry (where i do my very best thinking).

i want to start a little project on this little blog. let's call it the "blogger mixed tape project" shall we? 

here's how this will work:

1. in the comments to this post, leave me the name and artist of your favorite song. not just the song you are blasting in the radio right now (hello "somebody that i used to know"). but the song that for some reason, be it love or hurt or memory or an unspoken beast of emotion, is forever yours. if you want, share the story.

2. i'll leave this open until the end of may, and will refer to it often. please spread the word! tweet, link to this post, and share with your friends and fellow bloggers.

3. i will compile the songs and download them on itunes. if all goes according to plan, it will be more than one CD's worth. a collection, of sorts. like those box sets you can order off television, only better (much better, hopefully...)

4. on june 1, i'll host a giveaway on here. the winner (or winners...possibly) will win a free copy of the collection. i will also list the songs (and try to include a link on itunes) for anyone who wants to listen or download them.


this is my gift to you. my thank you thank you thank you for giving me a voice. listening to me. communicating with me on a daily basis. a collection of music from your fellow bloggers. the heart of your blogging community, all in one pretty package.

because sometimes, when i can't give language to the feeling in my spirit, when i can't assign an adjective to what i'm thinking about, i listen to music. and between the chords and melodies and scratchy voices of my favorite singers, i realize and release the breath.

of course, when i can find the words, i blog.

i say a little prayer for you

 via

because i need this today, and i suspect some of you may need it to, i want to do a little something different on here.

the blogging community is so big. it is full of girls writing about their favorite vintage dresses, their baby's first steps and their date nights with their husbands. it is a cathartic release for people writing through pain. through divorce. through deaths. through illness.

i woke up with a heavy heart for a family in my community. i woke up with nerves about a presentation coming up soon that's two years in the making. maybe it's the fact that the clouds are hanging low in the gray carolina sky this morning and my usual songbird wasn't perched in the tree outside my window when my feet hit the hardwoods, but i just woke up burdened.

and i thought, maybe you are too. maybe you need to share today the anxieties pulling at the threads of your soul.

if you would, please leave any prayer request, any nagging uncertainty or big, deep pain sitting on your spirit in the comments below. 

let's do this anonymously. a safe forum, an even playing field. since elizabeth's new year's post, i've been thinking about a way to incorporate an idea like this, and i feel strongly this is my version.

i will pray tonight. i promise. and if you feel led, my wish is that you too will pray for the requests.

how to leave an annoymous comment:
-select "post a comment" below this post
-in the box that says "comment as" scroll down to select "anonymous." 
-click "publish"

thank you, friends. for lifting me up, and for lifting each other up. it's a beautiful thing.

a shop giveaway

hi guys! hope everyone had a beautiful, blessed thanksgiving. a holiday with lots of food, time with family, and an awesome parade? it's one of my favorites. but alas, it is over, which means christmas is right around the corner! robert and i stayed up and decorated our little cottage last night, drinking eggnog and making christmas tree sugar cookies. i declare, a warm house twinkling with strung lights is quite possibly one of the homiest, comfiest and sweetest places to be.

to get us in the holiday spirit, i'm participating in a giveaway spree over at chambanachik. hop on over to enter to win a $25 gift card to my etsy shop! and while you're there, do stay a while and learn about the beautiful, spirited soul of my sweet friend erika. she's funny, darling and an excellent mama. one of my favorites in all of blogland.

*also: In the spirit of Cyber Monday, enter coupon code CYBER for 40% off everything in my shop, today only*

xoxoxo

prayers for nanno

my sweet grandfather, known in my family affectionately as "nanno," is going to the doctor twice tomorrow (wednesday, jan. 26) for some tests--once to the heart doctor and once to the gastroenterologist {digestive health}. the heart visit is just a check-up, but the other is not routine, and recent lower body pain has caused the appointment.

a little background on nanno:

• his name is sam.
• he turned 90 in october 2010. 
• he completes an entire newspaper crossword puzzle every single day.
• he is a banagrams champ.
• since he lost my grandma in 2003, he still talks to her in the mornings and evenings, at the foot of his bed in prayer, in the darkness of their bedroom. he's kept her sewing basket, hand lotion, and hairbrush beside her chair. they would have been married 65 years this year.
• he wears the most dapper berets and cardigans i've ever seen. robert wanted a sweater like him so bad, and dropped so many hints last year, that he was gifted with five cardigans in december. we called it a "cardigan christmas."
• he never asks for anything or complains, so any pain he mentions is serious.
• he is precious beyond words.

every tuesday, thursday and saturday, my family eats supper with nanno. before we eat, we hold hands around the table and thank the Lord for our blessings. 

so friends, i have an idea. a way to join hands, collectively across the blogosphere and pray, send up happy thoughts and well wishes, and just be united, at the same time. to help nanno get through his trial. if you pray, please do this with me. if not, is simply think of nanno, a stranger though he is to you, and send some positive vibes and happy thoughts his way.

if you'll join me, i'd like to pray specifically for his 10:00 a.m. appointment with the gastroenterologist. the blogging world is diverse and scattered, so for this to work, we have to think about several time zones. i think it would be so beautiful to bathe him in prayer at exactly the same time. complete strangers lifting him up at the exact moment he walks through those doctor doors. 

here's a little timetable. nanno's appointment is wednesday, at 10:00 a.m. EST. i am posting this on the this on tuesday evening because some of the times convert to quite early in the morning. i could not find a simple-to-use 24 time zone converter, but if your time zone is not on this chart, please go here for a world clock.

here are the times that correlate with 10 a.m. EST on wednesday:

 

prayer time zone chart

whether you're lying on your back in the warmth of your bed, sitting in a conference room, or taking your children to school, when it's your time, if you are willing, i'd so appreciate the prayers.

thank you. from the bottom of my heart, and the hearts of my family, thank you.

accolades and the girl God made

i won an award in the fifth grade, but i passed it up. i had to read a paper over the intercom, and my anxieties over my stutter forced me to give up the title (and a trip to the local theme park). you can read about it here.

but today it's different. i wish i could go back. to that little school in the middle of the country. with its trailers outside and cafeteria that smelled like cookies and chicken pie. to reclaim that prize and speak, even if slow and strained, over the loud speaker.

thankfully, my sweet blogger friends have given me the opportunity to receive another kind of award, and i'll accept it with humility, grace and appreciation! the best part? i can type my answers! 

the sweet, beautiful grace from loving life, the awesome in my tennis shoes, super talented bethani of when a girl met a boy, and the adventerous, fun ana from the world through my eyes sweetly gave me the stylish blogger award.

for a girl who still wears flared jeans and sometimes scrunchies (i dare you to find a better hold with a regular hair tie), this award truly touches my heart, so thank you. please go check out grace's blog. she is kind, funny, and honest about juggling school, work and being a girl in general. 

in my tennis shoes is a daily stop for me! the way she writes about her family and faith is so inspiring and refreshing.

bethani is my new favorite pen pal:) just got your letter, sweet friend! made my day, i tell you.

and ana is the epitome of cool and fun. did you know she made an impromptu trip to the big apple to watch the ball drop on new year's eve? head over to her blog and read about her fun adventure and her sweet grandpa!

i hereby tag:

1. angie, from living aloha

2. dawn, from puzzle pieces

3.    thisisme, from southhamsdarling

4.    amy, from a daring little life

5.    haley k, from LIFE is sweet...
6. jessica, from heart on homestead
7. diana smith, from the smith circle

all fabulous, beautiful bloggers that i want to learn more about. simply answer seven questions about yourselves, ladies, then pass the award on to more bloggers. i chose to honor seven.

so, seven things about me:

1. i am a child of God. i remember visiting my friend's church in middle school, and everyone went around in a circle and prayed a little prayer out loud. mine was something simple, like "thank you for this day and for always being there for me." but one girl said something i'll never forget. she said, "Lord, help me walk in a way worthy of being called your child." before my feet hit the wood floor every morning, i try to breathe up this prayer toward the ceiling, toward a God who hears me, understands me, and listens.

2. i love the circus. with an unmatched, unexplainable passion and fervor. the first thing i did with my christmas money? buy two front row seats for me and robert to the ringling brothers and barnum & bailey circus coming in february. front row, friends! there's just something nostalgic and beautiful about the circus. has anyone seen the movie big fish? you know the scene when ewan mcgregor first enters the circus ring and sees karl the giant? the whole scene just embodies the 1920s. it's magical, a little mystical, and just astonishing.

source

3. speaking of big fish, i had a sit-down interview with daniel wallace, the author who wrote the book on which the movie was based, for my college journalism final project. in his classroom at unc chapel hill. he told me about the saddest moment in his life, things he wished he could have changed, and why he wrote the book. it was the best interview i ever did. i aced the project.

4. robert and i are high school sweethearts. we got married exactly five years from our first date. total, we've been together seven years. that's not to say that our romance was perfect, or is to this day. but its those imperfections, those little arguments and big make ups that make it life...make it real.

5. i keep my hand lotion in the fridge. try it.

6. until my sister moved away to college, we had a life-sized cardboard cutout of tom cruise in our bedroom. for about 10 years. it was of him talking on the phone, in a scene from jerry mcguire. it scared all my high school friends.

7. one of my favorite movies is wild hearts can't be broken. i was a bit sad to hear that sonora carver, the woman the movie is based on, didn't care for the way her story was portrayed. i just finished her book, "a girl and five brave horses," to hear her side. both are fantastic. she dove horses off the atlantic city pier in the 1920s-1930s. there's so much more to it than that, but go read the book!

source

-----

so now you know a little more about me. thank you for not making me say these things out loud. this is better than a trip to the theme park, hands down.