guest post: five things: living together, by dacia

Greetings fellow vintch readers! I am Dacia from The Ruffly Owl, and I’m beyond excited to be guest posting here today. I recently told Courtney that she is my ‘chicken soup for the soul’ and I sincerely meant it. So when I was asked if I’d like to join in on this series I was honored. Here are five things I wish someone would have told me about living with your significant other, but consequently have learned along the way. xo, Dacia

1. You still need to clean up after yourself. The rules of living with your significant other are similar to the rules when you were living with your parents. You shouldn’t expect the other person to pick up your slack and your mess, and you should be mindful of your contribution to a clutter free and peaceful living space. After all, you’re not the only person living there. 

2. Grab your own towel. How many of us have jumped in the shower only to realize we’re out of soap, shampoo, or have no clean towel waiting for us on the hook next to the shower curtain? How many of us then shout out across the house (still in the shower) to our significant other for these things we forgot? Sure, we’re all human and forget or need silly things all the time. But if it becomes a habit and we begin to rely on the other person too often it can be a nuisance. 

3. Alone time is important. We’re a couple and now living together. We sleep together, eat together, and possibly spend all day together. That’s great, but we should still spend some time alone. The thought of being alone might be scary for some. Let’s be honest, it can be boring at times, but we should embrace it. Take this time to redo the polish on your nails, catch up on Oprah, read that book you’ve been putting off, take a bubble bath, or organize your shoes. Do something for you.

4. Have hobbies of your own. This is similar to number 3. Oftentimes we share so much of our lives together that we start morphing into each other. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it’s equally important to have your own hobbies and interests. Think about it, your s.o. goes out to ride mountain bikes with his friends (as is the case with my husband), and you partake in something you love to do. Maybe it’s crafting, having lunch with your girl friends, or shopping (as is the case with me on all of these). The point is you are an individual who has much to contribute to this partnership. Stay true to yourself and enjoy the things you like to do.

5. Be considerate of the other person. Of these 5, this is probably the most important. You’re in a partnership and you’re sharing a home. This partnership and home require work to function smoothly, and part of this work is being considerate of the other person. Did he/she have a long day; therefore, maybe we should take our turn to make dinner instead? Are we listening to each other, not just unloading our own stress? Are we checking in with each other about our schedules before planning things? If you think about it, being considerate for the other person is acting selflessly. After all, you’re not the only person in the relationship.

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thanks, dacia! be sure to check out her blog, the ruffly owl, and her etsy shop here.