Wednesday, November 17, 2010

replacing time

there's a little window beside my desk at work. all spring long, i sat and watched as little furball goslings stumbled behind their mamas. then, when summer arrived, i watched those goslings grow up into geese, navigating between the parked cars, scavenging for crumbs of take-out burgers, morning biscuits, or packed sandwiches. it was a beautiful evolution from baby to adult, all in a span of about three months.

but now fall has descended, taking away daylight savings time, and by 4:30 in the afternoon, my little window has turned black. the sun sets so incredibly early now, i can't see the geese. i can't see anything at all. the day feels so short. to me, sunlight equals energy. over the summer, when the sun was suspended in the sky until almost 9:00 p.m., it was as if the evening had endless possibilities. robert and i took countless walks down our road, we had many late night drive-through runs for wendy's frosties. we sat on our swing at watched the sun setting late.

now, we're ready for bed by 9:00, not walking in the fields. our eyelids begin to droop as soon as supper is over. watching glee last night took all the energy i could muster. it's not that i'm overly exhausted or overworked. it just that as sunlight=energy, darkness=sleepy.

so we created a plan. we decided to take that extra hour returned to us and instead of staying up later, we vowed to get up one hour earlier. this morning was our first try. we got up at 6 a.m. and selected a yoga television program on demand. i pulled on my leggings, drug my pilates mat out of the closet, and got ready for a half hour of relaxation, stretching and calm. but then we realized something. we neglected to read the description of the show. it was a jillian michaels yoga program. let me just tell you, this was not yoga, what she did. well, it was yoga, just yoga on about ten cups of coffee. five minutes in, i was already sweating. when she moved from a plank into push-ups, that's when we began to hate our lives just a little.

i looked over at robert, who had retreated to child's pose, his arms stretched out in front of him. we both looked at each other then silently, he turned the television off and we jumped back into bed, with 20 minutes left to sleep. and at that hour of morning, with the sun just creeping up, and a warm, dozing puppy curled up at my toes, 20 minutes was golden.

so we failed this morning. or did we? we tried. we know now that we are at least capable of waking up that early. so we'll do it again tomorrow. we'll try again. and maybe we'll fail again, but at least we'll fail together. but then--then we will grow together too. just like the geese. 


Ana* said...

I can absolutely relate with sun=energy, darkness= sleep. I have been trying to wake up at 6 am for the last 6 days. I manage to wake up but when I look out the window I can't distinguish day from night and end up going back to my warm bed. I wish I'd someone I could wake up early with or a puppy I could take out for a walk, (It would be so much easier).

Anna Katrina said...

you have a wonderful wonderful blog !!

stop by sometime<3

lindsay said...

i am totally on board with you and ana on this one. sun also is like energy and darkness is like sleep. however our little animals don't seem to see it that way at all. they like to wake us up extra (non bright) and early...when will their little bodies be used to the time change? i think i might just hold my breath ♥

Signe said...

hihi, this post made me smile!

and I would not call that failing to be honest, you need about 3 wild horses to get me out of bed before 07.00 so I think you did well! and to even ATTEMT to do yoga at that hour is like 10 plus points right there :)

Tanya (a Taste of T) said...

Sounds like a success to me :)

Peaches said...

I agree with you on the sun = energy, dark = sleepy because it's the same way with me. By 9pm I'm ready to hit the hay. But what's weird is that for the first time in my life, when my alarm goes off at 5:30am I'm almost ready to wake up. Hopefully your early morning tomorrow will be just as enjoyable as today's.

By the way - I love your posts. It was a busy day for me but I saved reading your post until the end of the day and I'm glad I did. :) It lifted my spirits.

-Sam I Am- said...

Girlfriend I could not agree more! And no you didn't fail at all, getting up that early is NEVVVVEERRRR a fail :)

Your blog is absolutely wonderful! I'm so glad we are blogging friends now. You seems so lovely! There's nothing I love more than finding an inspiring blogger! Can't wait to keep reading :)

Jenni said...

This post was so darn sweet!! And FUNNY, too!!! I enjoyed every word of it.

Think of it this way: dark winter evenings are a time for books and candles and cuddling and roaring fires in the fireplace and apple cider on the stove... maybe you should just try an extra cup of coffee around 4 or 5, to get you through the sleepy part.

You write so well... I love the light and airy feel to this post. :)

vintch said...

thank you, sweet friends, for all the encouragement! i think we'll start getting up early only to go eat breakfast from now on...that's a little more my style!

Jamie said...

I loved this post. & I love how you write.

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