Monday, June 6, 2011

wishing, and hoping, and thinking and praying


images found on the fabulous preservation north carolina web site.

robert and i talked for an hour as we walked along the country roads near our house. we waited until the sun was setting so the heat had a chance to cool and the wind picked up a bit. we talked about work, and about dreams. about the palatable, often indelible difference between the two. about working to make a living and simply living. and, as we tend to do when the stars start appearing and honeysuckle wafts in the air, we started dreaming. about owning a farm, and living off the land. about opening up a little diner, and, one of my favorites, bringing back the dying breed of drive-in movie theaters.

but we kept coming back to one idea.

a used book store with room to study. with long, old wooden tables and deep green library lamps. with low-sitting vintage sofas and a little coffee shop in the back. because it was our dream and therefore totally malleable, we envisioned a wing off the back where we could finally let pablo run off leash.

we pictured going to work together, and raising children among the shelves. bringing them with us and letting them sort and organize the titles. of little girls raised on laura ingalls wilder and boys on mark twain.

then, we reached mama and dad's house and just as quickly and arbitrarily as the dream began, it was over. replaced with pablo tugging on the leash and pulling us toward the front door. with chocolate ice cream cones and conversations on bar stools.

but it's still there. tucked away into some recess of my spirit that i may or may not tap into one day. in a shop not unlike the one above, an abandoned grocery store a few cities away from my own.

i may never reach the point where my work, home and dream life intersect perfectly and in succinct harmony. but i'm okay with that. because it's the reaching, the day-in/day-out good, clean living and prayers whispered at midnight that keep me hopeful. and if we never own that book store? life is still pretty dreamy, achingly so. right now, the dream looks like a sleepy dog wrapped up at my heels and the soothing hum of the shower. who knows what the dream looks like 10, 15, 20 years from now? only the good Lord, and that's enough to make this daydream believer happy.

18 comments:

Eleanor said...

thank you for your very sweet comment that made me smile. i love your writing and your dreams. i am a dreamer too! xo

Eleanor said...

oh and i love this, it sounds like a novel. so beautiful and poetic.:

'and, as we tend to do when the stars start appearing and honeysuckle wafts in the air, we started dreaming. about owning a farm, and living off the land. about opening up a little diner, and, one of my favorites, bringing back the dying breed of drive-in movie theaters.'

Diana Mieczan said...

So true...We never know how our dreams will look in a few years. I love your dream, sweetie. Have a fantastic Monday! Muah

Ps: I’m hosting a beautiful skirt GIVEAWAY today! Perfect for summer picnics!

chambanachik said...

What a beautiful dream. I think I have similar ones sometimes.

kimbirdy said...

all great things start with just a small idea, a wish in the back of your heart. it's true that dreams don't just happen, they take a whole lot of time, sweat, fear, perseverance - but if you are willing, you can have your dream.

Kristina said...

Oh I love dreaming! Absolutely love it!

Larri @ Seams Inspired said...

A dream is hope for the future. Without hope, you cannot dream. And yours is such a lovely dream. Thanks for sharing your heart. Happy Monday! :o)

DaisyGirl said...

I've always wanted to own a cozy little bookstore. The bookstore in "You've Got Mail" seems so perfect!

Hope you have a good Monday!!

Thisisme. said...

Oh my,wouldn't that be lovely, your own little bookshop, and to raise your children there! It's good to have your dreams my friend.

Anna said...

I can definitely imagine you and Robert with your lovely, homely, and warm bookstore with your beautiful children. Keep dreaming. Because God's plans are so much better than all that you can possibly dream.

You and your family are continually in my thoughts and prayers.

And I know--I feel very strongly in my heart--that He has something incredibly special stored just for you and Robert.

So keep dreaming, wishing, and praying.

Much love to my dear sister,
Anna

Amber Blue Bird said...

your book store sounds lovely, definitely a place I would like to spend time. I have a similar dream but with yummy pastries. :)

the southern hostess said...

I think about things like this all the time. Such a beautiful post! Looking forward to watching God's plans unfold for you and Robert.

Krystal said...

that is a beautiful daydream, one i would love to make real also :)

Shalyn said...

Beautiful dream, Courtney! I would come be your customer at the book store and the drive-in:-)

b. lee said...

I'm most positive I've used this term in ur comment box before ... but ...

"you've touched me"

the words I've read tonight are the same battles/beauties that tremble in my own being everyday * *

I want the best schools for my kiddos ... which we have now ... but dream to harvest & tread amongst pastures & rolling hills ... not just for my own indulgence; but for my ladies to breed upon ... ~~~

live in the present & embrace our blessings ... what will be ... will be ...

in time ...

it's a long way from where we've started from * tomorrow will continue to present opportunities ... if we choose to embrace them * *

sorry for the story-book tale ... but u inspire me ;) cheers to constant self-analyzation & personal growth * *

Amanda said...

Chase those dreams! I started my own store on the basis of a dream and a 'for lease' sign on an old store, and I wouldn't regret it for a second through good times and not so good.

Melissa said...

lovely to have found you and your dreams....

melissa x

bron @ baby space said...

Your dream sounds truly lovely -- and one I can relate to. Book stores are magical :)

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