Tuesday, May 24, 2011

to be an adjective

they wanted, as we say, to ‘call their souls their own.’ but that means to live a lie, for our souls are not, in fact, our own. they wanted some corner in the universe of which they could say to God, ‘this is our business, not yours.’ but there is no such corner. they wanted to be nouns, but they were, and eternally must be, mere adjectives.
 -c.s. lewis, the problem of pain
as poets like page breaks that feel like deep breaths, so a creative writer loves adjectives. my descriptor of choice is lovely. my best friend in middle school loved the word crisp. there are just some words that, when added to a noun, enhance tremendously. they add depth, meaning and image.

but as any elementary school teacher will sweetly inform you, adjectives that stand alone are meaningless. pretty. small. big. without a subject, they lose their form and become half-shaped. like the victorian house on the edge of our road, standing tall against the heavens, with cracking paint and loose shutters. almost perfect. almost special, but not quite whole.

i am not the sun. but there are summer days when the sunshine reflects off my cheeks. my eyelids. my nose. and i feel it and radiate with it. likewise, i want to stand so close to the Son that i am a mere reflection of His glory. and brightness.

in my Christian walk, it is only an adjective i aspire to be. but so often, so incredibly, unknowingly and sometimes purposefully, often, i become the noun. my little world revolves around the subject of Me. and yes, Christ is a part of it. He is present and there and totally within reach, but only to support my goals and end desires. in effect, an adjective to my noun.

but if we switch. if we just swap places, what a beautiful, whole, complex sentence we would be! and the sentences of my peers, my family, my friends and all the population would swarm together to create a beautiful story. the most beautiful one in history. in His story.


Ana* said...

what a beautiful poem, and post.

Chels said...

This post is awesome .. you're a lovely writer!

M. said...

you're always an encouragement to me.
i hope you know that your blog is a ministry of his grace. : )

Amber Blue Bird said...

you are such a talented writer

jennifer blair said...

this is incredible. i just want to give you a big hug right now! This was incredible. i've always loved that quote from lewis. I pray the same thing for my life.

DaisyGirl said...

Wonderful post. I really like the C.S. Lewis quote. It says so much. You have a true gift at writing such honest posts that touch us all deep in our hearts.

chambanachik said...

Every time I read one of your posts, I think, there is no possible way to top this! And then you write another one, one like this...


Anonymous said...

Dear Courtney,
You are just an amazing writer. One of my dreams is to major in English someday at a university just as you did. But I highly doubt I could ever write like you do. Your words just touch my heart and speak to me.

This post reminds me of my angel mom. She is someone who never says a sentence without adjectives, and knows how exactly use them, and I admire her so much for her beautiful use of the adjectives.

I am definitely going to share this with her =).

Thank you for sharing!



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