Thursday, May 19, 2011
we did it. we found homes for all the kittens. the first two left last weekend. unexpectedly, as i was handing them off to the sweet older woman down the road, tears welled up and i couldn't even look at her. i turned away and placed the little bodies into her arms. the last two leave this weekend.
and i can't tell you why i cried. it's just that, for two weeks, these babies were mine. entrusted to me. and i couldn't keep them. but i never thought it would be so hard to watch them leave.
no more midnight runs to the shed, with the light glowing in the darkness, and rubbing furry bellies. no more tails between my toes and little finger licks.
my goodness. am i ever going to be a basket case when dropping my firstborn off at college. i'll probably handle it like my mama, and hold it together in the dorm room. in front of the potluck roommate stranger. in front of dusted laptops and pencil holders. new comforters and laughter down the long hall.
but as soon as i get in the car with robert, i will undoubtedly lose it. and that's okay. it means i felt it. that tangible sense of loss. and to not feel it would be so much worse.
'tis the cycle of life i suppose. 'tis the beautiful, hectic, heartbreaking, gorgeous cycle of life.