Monday, January 3, 2011

sunset soon forgotten

i got to bed late last night. it wasn't for lack of trying. goodness knows, i tried.

tried to slip under the covers before eleven. to feel the cool of just-washed linens slip over my nightgown. to replace the glow of laptop and lamp light with the deep, infinite darkness of bed. to take down my ponytail  and let my hair fall carelessly over my pillowcase.

but life got in the way. errands. little menial tasks that meant nothing but added up to hours. dishes. playing with pablo. reality television. etsy.

with my sleepy eyes finally closing, and sleep threatening to wash over me and pull me over the brink any minute, i listened for a second. and felt.

i heard robert breathing heavily behind me. this deep, hearty breath. i'm used to it and barely notice it. but last night i made an effort to take it in. to turn and watch his chest rise and sink with the steady rhythm of a midnight pendulum. i heard pablo too. a raspy little puff of air every few seconds. as i looked up at the bedroom ceiling, i let their collective breath pull me to sleep. the sync of it, paired with the sweet melody it created, was intoxicating.

and right before i fell, i thanked the Lord for such a sweet sound. how many times i take for granted the living beings that share my bed. their breath gentle in my ear. the creatures that i have been blessed to love and listen to.

and i do this so often. take things for granted. become so, so used to something that it loses its grandeur.

--like the feel of cool hardwood on my bare toes in the early hours of the morning, when the world is asleep but i'm reaching toward the coffee pot.

--the house i pass on my drive to work every morning, always stuck behind the school bus. the little boy who lives in that clapboard shack. running with unbelievable fervor toward the bus, blowing kisses to his mama, waving from the driveway in her robe and slippers.

--the little basil plant on my windowsill, still reaching its meager leaves toward the sunshine. hanging on even after being stripped of most of its green.

--the sound of robert coming home after work. his muddy boots. yes, even the mud. a sign that he loves me and will do whatever it takes to make a home for me.

--the delicious heat of an evening shower. taken with the bathroom lights off, the adjacent office light bathing the room in a soft glow.

i will take all these things in, and be thankful. because they are all gifts that could be taken in an instant. little, tangible proof that God loves me, i am worthy,

and life is unforgettably beautiful.

california road trip 2010


Perfect Peace said...

This is so beautiful! It gave me tingles and goosebumps :)

Crazy Shenanigans-JMO said...

I love this! Have a wonderful day!

Seams Inspired said...

Absolutely beautiful! Thank you for sharing your heart today. Happy Monday! :o)

jeanette from everton terrace said...

I agree, there is so much beauty around us every day. It's how you look that determines what you see. Well done.

Shalyn said...

This was so special for me to read- I am someone who goes through life without taking notice of a lot of things. I feel like I walk around with my head down most of the time. I made a goal recently to start taking note of the small things and to OPEN MY EYES to the beauty around me- reading this reminded me of how important that is. Thanks love!

Ana* said...

I love this, there's so much we take for granted. Appreciating the little things in life is what makes it meaningful.

Happy Monday!!

Thisisme said...

I love it how you appreciate all those things. It's right, we do so often take things for granted, and we shouldn't. I find that as I get older, I really do appreciate the beauty all around me so much more. Life IS wonderful if we always look for the good in it.

In My Tennis Shoes said...

beautiful... we are so blessed!

Grace said...

such an inspiring post and beautiful. i know i take simple, yet beautiful things for granted and this just reminded me and opened my eyes of how happy and appreciative i should be for all the things i have. have a beautiful monday!

Diana Smith said...

Great post, I try and think about those small little things that I am grateful for too! There are so many to remember, but its nice when I stop for a minute and thank the Lord!

Ashley said...

Beautiful Beautiful Beautiful. Sometimes you forget all the tiny things that make life so wonderful. God is very good. Thanks for reminding me to remember to be grateful for all parts of my life.

Amber Blue Bird said...

i do the same thing, take things for granted. Its hard to remember to take time to appreciate these things. Thanks for the reminder

Oh and I have a music recommendation for you:
The Secret Sisters
The whole album is great but I think you would like the song "House of Gold" best

Confessions of A Confused City Girl said...

Love it. I agree, i find beauty in such small things now. Even in a loud and busy city like nyc, i still sometimes dull out the noise and admire the beauty around me. I have this fear of one day realizing i let things slip by me and so i try to soak everything up...

Check out my blog!
Confessions Of A City Girl

Jocelyn said...

you are such a talented writer! i love reading your posts...they warm my heart and brighten my day. thanks for that. God is good, all the time!

I'm AE Jones said...

Gosh you are so right. I do that all too often: take wonderful things for granted. I'm really going to work on that this year. Thanks for the great post.

Blondie's Journal said...

Beautiful post, as always. I feel so much like you do sometimes when I can't sleep...just listening to the breathing around me and the creaking of my old is comforting.


The Many Colours of Happiness said...

This was so lovely to read. I think you just made my day miss! Probably one of my favourite posts by anyone ever :)

S and O said...

Happy New year!
I hope that 2011 is just a wonderful delight for you :)

therufflyowl said...

this is one of the best things I've read in a while. Thank you. :)

I've been trying to take in the little moments in our day to day lives and appreciate everything as well. Something I saw (on Oprah, hah) really resonated with me. She spoke about being fully present in the moment. I want to be present in my life, and it has to start with each day, right?! :)

Dawn said...

good reminder.....

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